Cheryl Miller Dellasega

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Published by: Wiley
Release Date: October 5, 2007
Pages: 256
ISBN13: 978-0470168752

 
OVERVIEW

At one time or another, almost every woman has been involved in bullying. Whether her role was that of victim, aggressor, or bystander, the pain of relational aggression (female bullying) lasts long after the incident has passed. For those who get stuck in the mean girl role, the emotional warfare of high school can continue. As adults, these women hone their skills in verbal sabotage and behavioral put-downs. From the PTA clique to the carpool, from the gym to the boardroom, every woman knows someone who is suffering from the devastating dynamic of relational aggression.

In Mean Girls Grown Up, Cheryl Dellasega explores why women are often their own worst enemies, offering practical advice for a variety of situations. She introduces you to the "bees" of grade school who, as adults, are still involved in the same harmful dynamic: the Queen Bee, a bully who buzzes from place to place undermining and manipulating others; the Middle Bee, a go-between who spreads gossip or stands by as others do so; and the Afraid-to-Bee who retreats into passivity and is a target for aggression.

Drawing upon extensive research and interviews, Dellasega shares stories from women who have encountered these bees as well as the knowledge of experts who have helped women overcome the negative effects of aggression. You'll hear how adult women can be just as competitive and callous as their younger counterparts, using backstabbing, betrayal, harassment, misrepresentation, and exclusion to wound others.

You'll also discover: Why women often deal with conflicts differently from the way men do Strategies for dealing with women who use relationships to inflict hurt or prevent you from achieving your goals, how to protect yourself from being involved in deception, bullying, and other harmful behaviors

Dellasega outlines how women can change their behavior successfully by shifting away from aggression and embracing a spirit of cooperation in interactions with others. Even if bee-type behaviors have plagued you since adolescence, Mean Girls Grown Up will help you let go of aggression or passivity, move on, and create relationships that are healthier and happier for you and the women around you.

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PRAISE

“This book has proven to be the most valuable read ever for me in terms of understanding why there are some women who are just mean, others who are indifferent and still others who are just plain scared. It is a must read for all women of all ages. This book explains the different types of women and explains why some of them are the way they are. The book also details how to recognize and make changes so that the woman reading it can make necessary changes to be healthier and happier in regards to her relationships with other women and herself 🙂 A great find and a great read! Highly recommended!”
—Rebecca, Amazon Review

“I recommend this book to all women, regardless of which category you fall under. I hope those who like me are a bit afraid, can gain some confidence, some understanding, some methods of standing up.  For those of you who feel you are always in the middle, you are being used to do harm where you didn't intend to cause any... or maybe you enjoy it even if you aren't the mastermind.  And to you who are the queens bees, well, frankly, you will probably think that you aren't actually that bad, but you are, back off, pick on someone your own size, maybe seek some help (not that I could ever say any of that to your face.) I'm hoping the other books I read help me as this one has done.”|
—Love & Hate Book Reviews